Where has the time gone?

I find myself thinking a lot lately. Even more than usual, and I can't seem to stop, and honestly I'm not so sure that I want to. It's making me appreciate things so much more. Maybe it's the fact that my daughter is almost two years old (TWO?!?!), or that in 3 days, I will have known my husband for exactly 11 years. (I know, it's crazy.) Whatever the reason, I feel so thankful for what I have. (Even if sometimes it doesn't seem like it.) Any yes, I feel old.

Yesterday Brian and I took the side rail off of Danica's crib. I was so excited, but so sad that she is actually in her 'big-girl bed' now. She slept there for her nap and all night last night. Both times when she woke up, she didn't even get out, she just called to us until I came in and told her she could get out. (But when she's playing she climbs in and out of it all the time.) I am waiting for the night she she starts wandering the house on her own, and now that she can finally reach the door handles, she will go where ever she pleases. I don't know what were we thinking. Maybe I should put the rail back up tonight afterall...

(1/23/09 in her crib with that cheesey grin)

(1/25/09 in her big-girl bed...)

On January 29th, 1998, I met Brian at the movie theatre in Liberty. (fka The 'Berty 8, now the 'Berty 12) He was there on a blind date with my best friend (set up by her sister and his stepbrother), and I was dating someone else at the time. I was 14 and he was 16. We hardly even spoke that night, I was hyper, giddy, and (probably) pretty obnoxious. He was shy and quiet. I am pretty sure the movie was 'Good Will Hunting'. And look where we are now. I feel so lucky that I love my husband, and that we keep growing together. :)

I think that part of what makes me feel so old is that all our younger siblings are grown now, and they are starting their own lives. My mind can hardly wrap around that concept, I still see them as cute, awkward kids. (I can only imagine how our parents feel now. Can I say Oy?) And I say 'our' siblings, because to us, Brian's are mine, and mine are his. We have known each other since they were in elementary school, and they seem to have stuck that way, permenantly imprinted in my mind as an 11 year old. Now Christina's daughter is turning a year old, Chandra just got married and had her son, Gary has three little girls now, and Clayton, Darren and Laura are all in serious relationships themselves, and Laura is now talking about marriage. I want to cry! I'm realistically only 25, and as long as the Fates allow I have a long time left ahead of me. But I can't stop thinking I'm a quarter-century old, a grown up, a real grown up who is married, a grown up who has a child, a grown up with a grown up job. What the heck happened???

I know... I'm rambling again... *sigh*

It's been an emotional last couple of days...

Monday was great. Brian and I had a day off together thanks to the MLK holiday, so we made the entire day into a date. Brian dropped Danica off at daycare at normal time, and we went to Starbucks for a liquid breakfast. We drove downtown and went to Crown Center, where neither of us had been since we were dating over 10 years ago. We walked around, did a tiny bit of shopping and walked around for a while, and then we went ice skating. :) I was so excited, I hadn't gone since I was a very little kid, and Brian had never been in his life. It was so exhilirating, I forgot how much fun it is! And I must add that I was very proud of Brian, he didn't fall down once, and even tried skating backwards with me. (Although sadly yes, I fell down once right as we were leaving.) After we decided we had had enough of the cold for a while, we drove down to the Plaza and had lunch at the Cheesecake Factory. (Yum!) We talked and planned, and everything was so nice. (The only thing that could've made our date day any better was if it had been dark so we could've seen all the lights on the Plaza.) ;)



After lunch we went to the hospital to visit with Brian's step-sister Chandra, her hubby Nate, and their new baby. Westley Victor Kettlewell was born Monday morning while we were shopping, and he is so precious! Mom, Dad, and Westley are all doing as well as possible, except that they are all exhausted of course. He is so tiny... and holding him, that new, that tiny, smelling that good, wearing that little hospital hat... it was almost enough to make me want to have another baby right now. Almost, but not quite. :) (Let's wait until after our summer vacation and then we'll see what happens... )



The entire day played almost like a movie in my mind. It was just so nice to have a kind-of break from reality and to just be together. I feel so lucky to be so in love with my husband, and to know he loves me too. (Ok, cue the cheesey music now... )



And then yesterday was Inauguration Day. Wow. No matter what your political affiliation, I don't see how anyone could not be moved by the enormity of everything. Almost everyone in my office was peeking at a t.v. all day, and we all watched together for about an hour while the actual oaths were being taken and the speeches were made. I was literally in awe to see that many people, together for the same cause, supporting the same ideas, people from every background, all over the globe, it was truly amazing. Many times I had to hold back tears. Not even because of the new President necessarily, but because I felt like I was living in history. It's so hard to describe, but I couldn't help but think over and over again how I was witnessing probably the biggest world event in my lifetime as of yet. And of course I had set my DVR, and watched it again after Danica went to bed last night. I will probably watch it again tonight as well....




I guess my emotions just never get a break, do they? I swear I must drive those who know me crazy... up and down, up and down, it's crazy. But I guess that's what happens in life; everything is constantly changing, and sometimes it feels like it's all I can do to hang on for the ride.